this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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