office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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