the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
