So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
