so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
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