How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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