I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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