but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
