Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
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