On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
