Midget sex pt 2 tonight
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize
