you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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