I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
there was a trapeze. enough said
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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