mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
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