I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
If that was your dad, he is hot
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
