I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize