you're like a bully in the Christmas story
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize