ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
