At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
