I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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