so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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