And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
