after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
