I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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