I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
