I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
