the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
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