I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
He felt like a one man threesome
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
