Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
