I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
