I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Houston, we have a blender
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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