Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
