What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I think people are normalizing furries
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
