Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(770): View more from Georgia

I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.

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(770): I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter. http://tfl.nu/9rwz

Replies (20) Good night (3540) Bad night (606)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry

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(484): Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry http://tfl.nu/lyzu

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(912): View more from Georgia

It's not kidnapping if it's romantic

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(912): It's not kidnapping if it's romantic http://tfl.nu/j4mo

Replies (17) Good night (6398) Bad night (1733)
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(254): View more from Texas

His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!

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(254): His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!! http://tfl.nu/05kd

Replies (15) Good night (4806) Bad night (1660)
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(239): View more from Florida

While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".

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(239): While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth". http://tfl.nu/xyop

Replies (6) Good night (5059) Bad night (903)
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(770): View more from Georgia

Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.

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(770): Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob. http://tfl.nu/4q4p

Replies (9) Good night (1817) Bad night (1017)
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(516): View more from New York

Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.

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(516): Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper. http://tfl.nu/eehy

Replies (8) Good night (1738) Bad night (515)
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(818): View more from California

The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.

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(818): The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me. http://tfl.nu/w1nr

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment

(410): View more from Maryland

Thank god I got my shit together

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(203): Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment (410): Thank god I got my shit together http://tfl.nu/mezm

Replies (2) Good night (882) Bad night (469)
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(407): View more from Florida

If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.

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(407): If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3. http://tfl.nu/ytxl

Replies (3) Good night (1250) Bad night (410)
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(571): View more from Virginia

She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...

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(571): She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance... http://tfl.nu/5je2

Replies (3) Good night (684) Bad night (780)
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(925): View more from California

I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.

(415): View more from California

I still don't know how you've lived this long.

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(925): I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time. (415): I still don't know how you've lived this long. http://tfl.nu/6ttn

Replies (5) Good night (1029) Bad night (390)
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(520): View more from Arizona

Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.

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(520): Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are. http://tfl.nu/sjk3

Replies (5) Good night (919) Bad night (316)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"

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(+44): Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration" http://tfl.nu/5fdi

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(302): View more from Delaware

Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already

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(302): Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already http://tfl.nu/utft

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