i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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