at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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