Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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