i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
