im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
