what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
