Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
