I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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