chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
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