You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Found your dick twin last night
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
