First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
