Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
