2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
