I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
