I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
