What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
