We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Acid is not a monday night drug
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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