READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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